All big n tall n grown up

When is the moment you felt actually grown up?

First thing that springs to mind instantly is what age would that be anyways?

Technically adulthood begins at the age of eighteen but I know I still felt like a kid then. I went pretty much straight from Nintendo to minimum wage with almost no discernable bump in the road. I’ve heard being an artist keeps you young. I don’t know if it’s that or just our immaturity that does it, and I mean that in the best possible way. The fact that I’m on a bus at 43 right now typing this because, “well, why not? It would be cool” is apparent to me. Despite the fact that it’s a trip to my doctor which is still in the same Saanichton location since childhood (hence it being a trip) Most people my age have a car, the real serious job, kids, credit cards, bank loans and are renovating something. I’m learning to tap on my bass, getting ready to play St. Patrick’s, trying to find new beats to track and other things that are, let’s be honest, as grown up as playing with moonbeams. Even when I first mispelled “moonbeams” just now my cantankerous phone didn’t really try. Come on Pogson, you’re blah blah years old. I have a feeling that phrase will haunt me.

I have moments still of grownupness. Working minimum wage like jobs has a weird vampiric effect of making you feel like a kid when you’re not. My job now is still one done by people who I could easily be the parent of, or the weird but adorably fun uncle with the guitar. Go me.

Still grown up moments occur. Most are health when you find yourself limping because your foot just got moody. My gut health is a long running favorite. Pretty bad when you get very excited about the health properties of golden beets. This really happened.

Almost at my stop so I’ll wrap up. I think we will always have the adult and child in us. We need both, each one taking care of the other. Your adult is the protector and the child is the one who makes it all worthwhile. The child is more fun. It doesn’t need the washroom and then says “nope, nothing” once you’re there. The adult is then understandably grumpy. The child makes the joke of it. Suggests Instagram. You’re adult screams #AreYouF’NNuts?

The child winks and runs off and the adult follows, still nursing that damn sore foot.

Have fun!

😒😃

Tom

Right here and now

Bit of a different situation this morning has me here actually doing morning writing which hasn’t happened in a year or so.

It was the same thing that spurred on the first filmed script I ever did. It’s basically how I am. I don’t really relax that much when I know there’s still things I could do or I want to do.

After things happened a year ago I moved heavily towards music. In truth both things are always and have always been there. I just swung the creative pendulum hard. It is sort of fair as my band is literally the longest running job I’ve ever had and there has been other musical successes along the way (which helps me end the long running question of “I don’t know, am I meant to do this” amongst other reasons. Trust me this has been heavily considered, both from without and from within.)

Presently, along with trying to push my work with Cookeilidh to a new level I have the goal of compiling a cd of my own recordings. I have been writing and trying these newer songs out on Soundcloud/Instagram. My principle inspiration came from the story behind the music of Low Roar, who reputedly wrote a song a day for ages. With everything else that’s pretty out of my range but I have held to at least one new one per week since last year, some of which still haven’t been on social media for different reasons. Others aren’t born yet, and are still in note form.

I’d like to get back to writing again, perhaps in a new partnership process but this is exactly the thing. My way of working was very specific back then and now it’s finding a new way. Velios was part of that exploration process, despite it’s flaws. I dont have the glacial patience for writing novels like I used to. I wrote a book back in my late 20s (not published) and it was such an albatross its just put away. It’s the time it takes, and when I say that, I mean the loss of time if you’ve spent months or years only to find it’s a dud. In film or music you can sniff out a dud in under a day. Films start with the pitch process, music with the first take. Let it sit and look again. Very easy in fiction to make it more complex that a show which has to be a simple episodic product. Or maybe I’m wrote. Just can’t imagine pitching to myself.

We have company over which is why I’m not in our living room, in bed having coffee, which brings me to my rambles as the city of Victoria undoubtably wakes up outside the curtains.

Was thinking I could get back into those blog a day things you find as they were fun. I mean, i dont exactly wake up and immediately snap my headphones on every day so it’s not impossible. That and morning pages which this post virtually is now. Not in the purest sense of course as morning pages are much less filtered and…ok…one thing I find annoying is that I was told morning pages have to absolutely the first thing you do. That first thing tyranny drives me crazy. What doesn’t vie for that morning pole position anyways?

Seems like a good spot to finish.

Can’t drink my coffee when I want to also stretch my legs into the cooler parts of the blanket.

😀

Tom