All big n tall n grown up

When is the moment you felt actually grown up?

First thing that springs to mind instantly is what age would that be anyways?

Technically adulthood begins at the age of eighteen but I know I still felt like a kid then. I went pretty much straight from Nintendo to minimum wage with almost no discernable bump in the road. I’ve heard being an artist keeps you young. I don’t know if it’s that or just our immaturity that does it, and I mean that in the best possible way. The fact that I’m on a bus at 43 right now typing this because, “well, why not? It would be cool” is apparent to me. Despite the fact that it’s a trip to my doctor which is still in the same Saanichton location since childhood (hence it being a trip) Most people my age have a car, the real serious job, kids, credit cards, bank loans and are renovating something. I’m learning to tap on my bass, getting ready to play St. Patrick’s, trying to find new beats to track and other things that are, let’s be honest, as grown up as playing with moonbeams. Even when I first mispelled “moonbeams” just now my cantankerous phone didn’t really try. Come on Pogson, you’re blah blah years old. I have a feeling that phrase will haunt me.

I have moments still of grownupness. Working minimum wage like jobs has a weird vampiric effect of making you feel like a kid when you’re not. My job now is still one done by people who I could easily be the parent of, or the weird but adorably fun uncle with the guitar. Go me.

Still grown up moments occur. Most are health when you find yourself limping because your foot just got moody. My gut health is a long running favorite. Pretty bad when you get very excited about the health properties of golden beets. This really happened.

Almost at my stop so I’ll wrap up. I think we will always have the adult and child in us. We need both, each one taking care of the other. Your adult is the protector and the child is the one who makes it all worthwhile. The child is more fun. It doesn’t need the washroom and then says “nope, nothing” once you’re there. The adult is then understandably grumpy. The child makes the joke of it. Suggests Instagram. You’re adult screams #AreYouF’NNuts?

The child winks and runs off and the adult follows, still nursing that damn sore foot.

Have fun!



What really changes?


About to practice. As always.

    Morrissey is someone that even if you don’t like his music you should at least check out his interviews.  It’s the straight sometimes brutally funny honestly that I admire.  His songs actually make me happy despite their somber nature.  Maybe it’s because of that nature.  It doesn’t push me to smile.  It slaps me on the back and I smile at life’s built in absurdity.

I’m literally sitting on my bed about to practice as I write this.  I have the Victoria Highland Games coming up with my band Cookeilidh and as such I’ll keep it short.  But the question is, do we really change over the years?  Morrissey stated that who we are at age twelve is pretty much who we are.  Comedian Dylan Moran states “you’re not an adult…you’re just a tall child holding a beer” and Tracey Thorn of Everything but the Girl sings how “The Heart remains a Child”.  Here’s me sitting on my bed, which is a rumpled mess of course, surrounded by the writing and other stuff I’m working on and have big, big crazy dreams about.  Someone else is all about serving people and making people smile.  Want to bet that person had a little tea set growing up?  Someone’s working on cars.  Definitely grew up around their dad in the garage (or a variation thereof) and had a love of Hot Wheels.

What do you simply do the grown up version of now?  I do think we fine tune our distinctions over the years and I’m with Jax Teller that “what doesn’t kill you doesn’t make you stronger…” since these things that don’t supposedly “kill you” just make you seek inwards from the world that can be hurtful.  I am so at the risk of the inner child discussion here, and I do laugh at some of the thoughts I had back in my early years.  Why even last week…yeah, yeah…

But embrace it.  Reminice.  I still have my old 8 bit Nintendo games.  Nothings more fun that walking around town listening to a remix of the Legend of Zelda theme song.

Zelda remix.  So worth it.


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